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[ January 9th never used to hold any significance for him, but ever since his memories returned to him, the date has loomed large in Asougi's head. Only a few others had really stood out before — the date his father left for Great Britain 16 years ago, the date of his mother's passing nearly 10 years ago — but this was different, somehow. It's not every day that you get to 'celebrate' the day of your own passing after all, even if it all turned out to be one huge farce.

It goes without saying that it's near impossible for him to sleep that night, with that on his mind. He wakes up just past midnight, eyes straying towards the window to confirm that it's still dark outside and not even remotely close to morning, and then he sighs deeply. For the next hour, he changes his position again and again, trying to settle back in so he can close his eyes and drift back off to sleep. It's stupid for him to not be able to. Eventually, he sits up, rubbing at his forehead in annoyance. He pauses, hand drifting down and around to the back of his neck for a moment. It had long healed up, leaving only a scar as a reminder of what had happened. With a soft grunt in frustration, he stands, lowering his hand and going out of his room to sit in the main room in the attic for a bit. If nothing else, Asougi could distract himself with a book for an hour or two until he feels ready to fall back to sleep again and promptly ignore the date altogether. ]

[As Asougi walked out to the main room, the door to Naruhodou's room opens. Looks like he wasn't going to be getting much sleep tonight either. He was coming out to get some air, maybe make some tea when-] -Oh!

[There be Asougi in the main room. For a split second he looked thoroughly shocked and confused. It's as if he had seen a ghost, like he was having another dream that his friend wasn't...he shakes his head, frowning. He's alive, it's just the day messing with his sense of reality right now.]

— mm?

[ Asougi looks over at the sound of Naruhodou's door opening, appearing just as confused as his friend for a moment. He dips his head, chuckling softly under his breath. Of course. Of course Naruhodou knew what day it was, and of course he couldn't sleep either. If anything, he had more reason not to. ]

. . . It looks like we both had the same idea, huh.

...Yea. [No matter how many times he tells himself he's fine, that there's no need to fret over this day anymore, he still couldn't quite escape the memory of that time. He lowers his gaze, finding it difficult to look at his friend right now.]

I was...going to make some tea. Um, would you like some?

[ Asougi has already turned to the side to distract himself with something, anything, eventually settling on a random book that had been laying out on the desk. He scoops it up and opens it, crossing the room to sit down with it, only glancing up at that question and nodding once. ]

Tea . . . . yeah, sure. I'll have some.

. . . [Usually it's a convenience to have a single stove setup here for the occasion of making tea, but right now, a part of him wanted to make tea down in the kitchen proper instead. In the end, he will prep the pot here and then sit on the floor, waiting for the water to boil.]

. . .

[ He turns his focus back to the book in front of him, flipping the page quietly. The silence between them felt so unnatural and yet, he finds that he can't — or rather, doesn't want to break it, letting it hang there instead. Better than the alternative.

After a moment, without him even realizing, one of his hands strays back up to his neck, rubbing at it idly. ]

[By chance, Naruhodou looks in Asougi's direction when he started rubbing the back of his neck. Just a few days ago, he saw what was there, a scar, left behind as an awful reminder of what his friend had gone through. He continues to stare, even as the pot starts whistling.]

[ The whistling catches his attention, especially when it goes on for longer than it should. Asougi turns, glancing over his shoulder and lowering his hand as he does so, raising an eyebrow over at the pot. ]

Were you planning on waking up Holmes, too?

[ There's none of his usual teasing bite to that remark, though — he just sounds tired. Naruhodou staring hadn't escaped his notice. ]

Huh? Oh-! [He frantically turns the stove off before all the water ends up evaporating. He sighs, as his shoulders slump.]

Sorry...

[ Asougi sighs, shaking his head slowly. ]

Seriously . . .

[He continues to prep the tea in silence. Once he poured out the tea, he stands, coming over to Asougi and presenting him with a cup. His eyes were distant, as if he wasn't quite all there in that head of his.]

[ Asougi turns and gives him a long look, glancing from the tea to Naruhodou himself. His brows furrow briefly. The last thing he wanted to do was talk about this— or any of this, for that matter. But someone has to shake him out of his stupor, and that usually falls on his shoulders; today is no different, even if he did "die" on this day however long ago.

He takes the tea, speaking firmly as he does so. ]

So. You can stare at the injury that took my memory and nearly my life as well, but you can't even look your best friend in the eye?

[That manage to give him a start, snapping him out of his daze.] I-I... [He squeezes his own cup, shutting his eyes.]

...I keep seeing something else instead. [That photo, the crime scene once more. He opens his eyes once more, though he still couldn't meet his friend in the eyes.] No matter how much I tell myself that isn't true anymore, I can't shake this image away.

[ He considers him for a long moment, not moving when Naruhodou opens his eyes and keeps his gaze averted. Then, silently, he reaches over to take Naruhodou by the wrist. It's an abrupt movement, but he's not trying to make him spill his tea or anything. ]

[The sudden grab makes him flinch for a second, though he manages to keep a grip on his cup. He blinks, staring at the hand on his wrist for a long moment. He adjust his cup, so he could place his free hand on top of it. This is real. He lets out a bit of air he hadn't realize he had been holding in. Slowly but surely, he'll look up to the friend that this hand belonged to.]

. . . Don't tell me you're afraid of confronting the truth now, Naruhodou.

[ Setting his own cup down, Asougi reaches over for the hand that Naruhodou placed on top of his, taking it gently. He leans forward just a bit, so he can easily bring Naruhodou's hand to the back of his neck, resting it beneath his collar, where the scar is. There's a slight bump there, indicative that something happened at some point, though it's long healed over.

Asougi keeps that hand over his, glancing up at him. It wasn't pretty to look at, and he'd be lying if he said he didn't feel extremely uncomfortable right now, with their hands pressing against it even lightly. But it was necessary. ]

Edited 2018-01-08 02:37 (UTC)

-!! [His hand jerked a few times as Asougi brought it to the back of his neck. He remembered how Asougi took to being touched there, he wanted to pull his hand away to avoid causing him stress. Even with his hand over the wound, his fingers weren't quite touching his neck, just brushing it. He looks from their hands, to Asougi with a stunned expression. Was he really all right with this? But he was serious, there was clearly no hesitation in his decision to do this, for his sake. He takes a deep breath.]

No. [Carefully, he gently rest his fingers over the scar, trying to keep his hand steady. It's....certainly a different feeling, to touch the actual injury, versus what he sees in his mind.]

[ He's tense, and it's clear from his body language that he's not okay with any of it — at first, anyway. When Naruhodou rests his fingers over it, Asougi slowly starts to relax just a bit, tension starting to leave him. There was something comforting about that gesture in a way. ]

. . . Here. [ And at that, he shifts his position just a bit, dipping his head so that if Naruhodou wants to get a better look at it — a look that isn't from across the spa, in the haze of the onsen — he can. ]

[Honestly, he rather not continue to put Asougi through this, but if he's going to get pass this, no matter how painful it is, he knows he has to look. He'll set his cup down, and then slowly move the hand that was on his neck away so he could see. He lets out a quiet gasp, once he sees the scar fully for the first time. Really it's the first time he's seeing a real remnant from that incident and not in a photo, something tangible. His lips thinned as he took in every bit of that ugly scar.]

So...this is the truth. [His fingers hesitantly linger over the scar once more. He wanted to put his hand back on it, as if hoping it would heal it, make it less painful for Asougi.]

[ He can feel his body tense up once more when Naruhodou gasps, but he remains still, head bowed so his neck is clearly visible. He hums softly at his statement instead of nodding, drawing his hands down and out of the way finally, resting them at his side. ]

This is the truth behind what happened that night. [ How he'd hit that bedpost with an unbelievable amount of force, how he'd crumpled to the ground without a chance to even shout, how he'd lost nearly everything that night — except for his life. ] . . . I don't notice it much these days, unless I touch it.

...Or when someone else does. [It's then that he stops himself, lowering his hand. After looking at the scar for another moment, he finally moves to sit down next to Asougi. His fingers gently brushes his.]

...Thank you.

. . . Yeah.

[ And it's in that moment, with his head bowed and hair hanging in his face, that he allows himself the briefest moment of vulnerability, eyebrows creasing with grief.

Asougi then sucks in a bit of air before letting out a deep sigh, straightening up and rolling his shoulders once or twice as he runs a hand through his hair, keeping the other close to Naruhodou's. ]

It would have been troublesome if you spent all night and day avoiding me. That's all.

[He hums quietly, then turns to look at his friend properly as he composes himself once more.]

I really do appreciate it. I didn't have anything, but what I experienced that day for these last few years. [He gaze softens.] You're here...and everything's going to be fine. [The way he said that, sounded like a mantra to himself.]

Yeah.

[ He nods again, giving a simple, quiet response. But as he does so, he reaches over with his other hand to take Naruhodou's, lacing their fingers together. "A few years" . . . he couldn't even imagine it. One seemed overwhelming as it is. ] . . . We're fine now.

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